Perfection Does Not Belong in a Marriage

Surprisingly, I do agree that a woman can do it all and have it all. I do not believe this can happen at the same time. The idea of a perfect woman, great mother and ideal wife is not a real conception. This is a fairy tale.

In my many years of traveling and meeting women, I have run into many types of women, but none have been all in one. Of course, it is totally possible to be successful in your career, have a great marriage and be a wonderful mother, but I do not believe it is possible for all of these things to be happening simultaneously. If there is a woman who begs to differ, she is certainly lying.

To have a successful life, you must make choices. Women who examine their situations and make choices, are successful when they prioritize. When a woman tries to be like her mother was or what she thinks society would like her to do, she is not making the best choice for her. If you do the opposite thing your mom did or the same thing your best friend does, you have to do what is right for you. What makes you happy and fulfilled is the best choice for you.

I have heard many women tell me they are doing one thing, but wanting to do another, and always eluding happiness and fulfillment. Feeling like a failure because they are not doing what they feel they are expected to, is always the end result. I had an email from Emily, who purchased Light His Fire and Light Her Fire, she writes, “Being a good mother was my first priority but for the past few years, I’ve been buried by diapers. Having three children all under the age of five has consumed all of my time. It was my husband’s idea that we get both programs and concentrate on each other for a while. We had begun to feel like strangers. Now it’s time to get back being a wife.” I have received many emails stating the exact opposite, illustrating my point that each woman has different choices to make.

If a woman has a career and is focusing on that, she cannot possible take care of the house and cooking and children as she could if she were home. The same is true if you are concentrating on your husband, you cannot only pour yourself into your children all the time. My program will explain more on this subject. The key is stop trying to be s supermom or superwomen and your guilt will dissipate.